sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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