I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
