Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Its about making memories worth repressing
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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