you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i will never coherently bang her
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Thank you for not boning my boss.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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