Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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