This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize