Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
