My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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