I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
