Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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