i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
