the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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