PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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