wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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