i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize