I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
