i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the right to judge tonight
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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