My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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