BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
