i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
she smelled like a LAN party
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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