Kiss
Puke
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i would punch a child for taco bell
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
