Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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