she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Do vagina's smell?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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