garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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