You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
