I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
well you can't waste a boner
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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