so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
home. puking in laundry basket.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
