3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize