Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
