You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
