so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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