I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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