"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
