Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
