Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
someone owes me an orgasm
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
