yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
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