Please, let me fuck your mom
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Randomize
