Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
