11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
