but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
