I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
