He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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