Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
