ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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