I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Randomize
