i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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