I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
