ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
