just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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