Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
