So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
